Yes, every path likely has its share of suffering, unfortunately.

No, you don't need to add more misery on top of that.

Based on your final paragraph, I'd say you have the right idea on how to move forward. But if you're anything like me, I'm sure that saying the words and putting them into action day in and day out are two very different beasts.

Curious. What's the culture like at your gym? I'm reading between the lines, but it seems like you may want something different from your jiu jitsu than the dominant culture of your gym wants for its/your Jiu jitsu.

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